Photo: Note to self–in my next life, be sure to marry another engineer. They are incredibly helpful for all the things. The Husband is amazing! He built two of these in one night! How you like me now, groundhog!?
Today was the last day of school for two little boys. I neglected to take a picture of them. We were busy. There were not a lot of tears. Matter of fact, the boys were very matter-of-fact about it all. Time at this school is over. On to the next adventure! I really must say that I’m surprised. We’ve spent three years at this little school and made a lot of friends. The fact that all three of us walked away from it without a lot of emotion is interesting to me. Were we emotionally unattached? Was it not that great of an experience? Are we simply ready to move on? Maybe my boys really are just running toward the next place.
There was plenty of that this week… the running forward. Major had his prescreening today, which meant that the three of us got to go to his new elementary school and meet his teachers. We were late, of course, so I clutched Minor’s hand while guiding them to where they needed to be. They walked with their mouths open, a continual chorus of “whoooaaa, it’s so big” coming from them as we walked through the parking lot. We walked in to see all of the kids in the building streaming into the cafeteria for some sort of performance. Children big and small streaming down the hallways in familiar lines. The boys didn’t really know where to focus. They certainly didn’t want to stay with me.
and when Major got to go off with the teachers and other new kindergarteners while Minor had to stay behind? Lord, I thought it was going to be the tantrum of the ages!
He sulked instead. He climbed into my lap and sulked, missing his brother. Next year is going to be a fascinating experience for sure. Major went with his teacher without a care. Didn’t even wave goodbye to me! Some of the other kids tossed their mothers anxious looks, their mothers waving and blowing kisses in reassurance. Me? I didn’t get a chance to do that, either! Major was out. Very well, sir. I understand.
My Quiet Thoughts are about what a huge difference just a few years can make. Then again, there are some things that stay the same. As I sat in a small conference room with a few new kindergarten moms, I felt awkward and uncomfortable, wanting to make a good impression but too tired to really make the effort. Here we go again. They seem all too delighted to enter a new community while I know that I struggle with it. Unlike before, when we first moved here and I was eager to make connections, I feel established here. Then again, I know that I’ll see some of the preschool moms more often than others, and all of those relationships will change as we all separate and become part of new school groups. It’s going to be bittersweet to drift away from some while weaving new ties to others. I wonder which is better? The seemingly abrupt severance of a move far from friends or the slow, excruciating fade of simply joining new circles? Time will tell.
In the meantime, I’m reminded that children are strong and wonderful. I’m proud of my boys, who said their goodbyes but also took brave steps forward with excited smiles and wide eyes. I hope they will keep this sense of wonder and adventure in their little hearts forever. I hope they’ll even share it with me, giving me the strength I need to chase after them.
I have a bit of news, Dear Reader: I am taking next week off. I’ve been presented with the opportunity to do a bit of writing without interruption and I’ve decided to take it. I may put up a brief little post on Monday reminding you that I’m out, but after that, don’t expect anything from me. I’m working on a novel that I’m really excited about and proud of, but progress came to a screeching halt after the lipoma incident, and I’m trying to re-establish my habits. Furthermore, my freelancing has picked up and I need a bit of time to catch up and think toward the future. There is also the wonderful project I have going with my sister that I need to do some tasks for. I just need a little bit of time, Dear Reader, to get it all together. Then I’ll be back, hopefully with fresh ideas and a good attitude. Forgive me for stepping away, Dear Reader. I hope, ultimately, it will benefit the both of us.
It is a beautiful summer Friday, with crickets singing outside my window and wildlife scurrying about in the grass. I wish you a quiet night, clear and cool, with perfect sky to look up toward while your mind wanders. I wish you good, deep sleep, lasting long after the sun rises and with the opportunity to extend it as long as you want it to last. I wish you good, fresh food, preferably found at a local farmer’s market. Our CSA delivered beautiful heads of lettuce and a bag of gorgeous spinach. What will you find out there? Dress it lightly so that the natural flavors can sing for you. I wish you a long conversation, meandering and free, preferably one that ebbs and flows between intimate whispers and boisterous laughter. When was the last time you lost track of time thanks to good stories and better company? Try for it, see what you gain. I wish you a kiss on each cheek, a tight squeezing hug, and the opportunity to say “I love you” to someone with sincerity and earnest. Believe it when they tell you the same thing in return. You are loved, you know. And admired. You bring joy to people’s lives, you set great examples for others to follow. What you do in this world matters greatly to someone. Don’t forget that.
Until the 13th, be productive, be kind, be inspiring, and take care.