Photo: This is actually from a long time ago. I… haven’t taken any pictures this week. I don’t even know how that happened. But since this post is about Ursa Minor, I figured he should get top billing for the post today. Yes, that slice of pizza was bigger than his face. Yes, he did end up eating it all… except the crust. Why doesn’t anyone ever eat the crust?


Ursa Minor’s birthday is next month. The Husband wants to have a party.

I… don’t.

Parties are work and parties mean people…

As many of ya’ll well know, I deftly avoided the over-the-top fifth birthday party for Major by having us all go to Great Wolf Lodge for a night. It was a fantastic little getaway and a perfect way around the whole birthday shenanigans I hate so much.

Buuuuut it was expensive. Too expensive to do twice in a year. I’ve been avoiding having to deal with it for the last two weeks. We even had our trip to Portland and it didn’t come up. I thought I was gonna get away with somethin’, Dear Reader!

Then The Husband comes to bed with his face all contorted in that “I’ve been thinking” sort of way that he does. Next thing I know, he’s all, “have you given any thought to [Minor’s] birthday next month?”

I look up from my Kindle (I’m reading The Revenant and, yeah, it’s awesome) and sorta shrug. “Have you given any thought to [Minor’s] birthday next month?” (That’s a ol’ mindgame you can do on husbands. Usually works like a charm…)

“You don’t want to do what we did last year?” My husband asks me. (Why does he need to make it about me? Seems he’s got mindgames of his own!)

Here is why I don’t want to do what we did last year:

Last year, we had the All Yellow Everything party. Yellow plates, yellow napkins, yellow forks, yellow cake, yellow rice, yellow table cloth, yellow cups, ALL YELLOW EVERYTHING. The boy loves yellow! The cake was yellow cake with yellow frosting with yellow words and yellow decorations on it. The poor baker at Wegmans was like, “are you sure?” Minor, from the basket: “I really like yelllloooowwwwwww!” 

We invited two of our favorite families over because we were worried about space. What if it rained and we had to play inside? It ended up being a nice day, so I fired up the grill, we made sure there was booze and shrimp for adults, and we enjoyed the big lawn and the sunshine. Yes yes, fine fine. It was nice

but exhausting. 

Because The Husband doesn’t remember all the prep I did to make that happen. The cleaning, the pre-party food prep, the set-up, the grill cleaning, then the during-party food cooking and serving. And, as many of my long-time readers will recall, my husband is a very introverted man. Very introverted. We’ve known these folk for years now, and have been with them for many social occasions, but he’s still pretty quiet, still keeps to himself. He’ll jump at the first duty if he means he doesn’t have to stay invested in a conversation for longer than he’s comfortable with. Soooooo, that means that I did all of that stuff that I already listed and I had to be the hostess who kept the conversations going.

Work. It’s all I’m sayin’. It’s work. I love my son, I want to celebrate his birthday, I just don’t feel like doing the big grand birthday thing this year. Not feelin’ it. Not feelin’ it at all.

So I’d been working on my pitch. It was such a brilliant gambit. I had to set the mood right, very serious, very focused. Had to make sure that it was delivered fairly casually: “You know, [Minor] really loves to play with his cousins so much. Maybe, instead of doing the whole classmates party thing, we should just have your brother and them come up and we’ll have a big cousin sleepover birthday.”

Oh yes, Dear Reader. That’s how much I don’t want to host a big fat birthday party. Enduring my brother-in-law and his nonsense for a good 24 hours is exhausting, but manageable. A different sort of entertaining. One that I can deal with. And it’s true! Minor really does love his cousins!

The husband thought about it. The pause was pregnant, his eyes on the floor, his cheeks puffed out in consideration.

“Nah,” he concluded. “Isn’t the best thing about these parties that he gets a few more presents and he gets to see his friends outside of school? It’s a good thing for him to have his friends over. It’s just a couple of hours… right?”

Blarg. Check and mate before the game could even really begin.

So, I’ve been staring at my phone all day trying to come up with a birthday party. A menu to make adults happy, a list of activities to keep the children happy, and more ideas to make the whole world yellow for my sunshine-happy little guy. Awesome.

It certainly isn’t helpful for my ego that bloggy neighbor Tikeetha has totally rocked the birthday planning for her little man! I was just over there saying that I was going to up my birthday game so as to keep up but I can’t. Birthdays make me feel meh. Very meh. My childhood was full of low-key birthdays and you know what? I turned out fine. Grumpy, but fine.


Anyway, if anyone out there has awesome ideas for All Yellow Everything Party The Sequel, send me a link. I need some inspiration and I have a little over a month to get it together.

A quick note about the Fox: She came out during while we were eating dinner this evening. She and all five of the kits were out and hanging by stone fence, close to the barn. The kits are quite fat and rambunctious, and we witnessed a lot of wrestling and chasing. She stood on top of the fence and watched. They tried to follow her, but they are too small to jump it and not quite adept at climbing. The boys thought they were adorable. And the reasons why I confirm that I’ve been seeing the vixen out with the kits instead of the male counterpart is because she actually stopped and suckled the kits right in the middle of the yard! Oh my God! It was amazing! That’s right–just stood there and they all crowded under her and they stayed like that for a good long while.

Now, I know what you are thinking: “Where is the picture!? That was your chance to get the picture!”

I thought about it. Then I remembered what it was like to breastfeed. Who wants to have their picture taken when someone is tugging on you like that? Let alone five someones? It ain’t right. If someone had taken a picture of me while I was breastfeeding one of the boys, violence would have followed. Seriously. So I let my dear fox do her thing without any intervention from me. Hopefully she’ll give me another opportunity to take a picture of her and the wee ones at another time.

Now, I’ll warn you right now, I might not post Quiet Thoughts on Friday. I’m off to camp with my Confirmand for the big Confirmation Retreat for church. I’m excited and nervous, having never done any of this before. It will either be awesome or awful. Either way, I have a very short day on Friday, so I don’t know if getting to this computer is in the cards for me. So if I don’t post anything on Friday, don’t think I was abducted by aliens. I promise to be back on Monday.

Until I see you next, take care.


6 thoughts on “If Only I Could Outsource This…

  1. Movie Titles inspired by this post:

    All Yellow Everything The Sequel: Amarillo Skies
    All Yellow Everything The Sequel: Bumble Bee, Butterscotch, Tango
    All Yellow Everything: Canary Chronicles

    (I’m clearly loopy tired…)

  2. LOL. Really? No fox picture? It sounds amazing. Girl, just do your thang. I’m trying to figure out how to cut the guest list because the space doesn’t hold everyone. Ain’t that a blip? Whew! Party planning is exhausting. Are you going to do yellow again or go with something else he likes too to make it easier on yourself? Make the hubby clean the grill and cook the day before. Do evites and have plenty of wine around.

        • April 23rd. April Break screwed up my life. His birthday is Tax Day. I was like, boom! Have the party on the Friday or the Saturday… but people get out of town on the Friday of April Break so… everything got screwed up. I surveyed the moms of kids we were gonna invite and most folk will be back by the 23rd, so that is what we’re going with.

          Of course, that means that I’m going to have the week from hell. Clean the house, prep the food, prep the party stuff, do the grocery shopping AND DO IT WITH NO SCHOOL!?!?!?? Worst idea ever.

          Oh, and Camp NaNoWriMo is next month and I’m SUPPOSED to be writing. Lord if I’m not being punished by the universe for somethin’, I swear!

          • Well at least you have time to plan but the kids being home would totally throw me off track. But, you know what? If your house is a mess it’s okay. You have kids. Don’t sweat it. Don’t forget to post the pictures of Yellow Birthday – Part Deux. Also, I’m praying that you write until your hearts content.

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